5/12/2013

连续两晚，
睡不到4个小时。。
搞不懂，
将自己累倒是为了什么？？
面具戴久了，
渐渐的已看不清自己。。
我已开始分不清哪个是真心的笑容了。
笑容背后的无奈与伤痛，
能让一句‘算了吧’将它略过吗？？

是逞强还是坚强？？
若无其事是我的伪装？？
还是我低估了我的坚强？？

以前的我，
总是害怕受伤。
只要知道自己会伤害，
就会逃回自己的乌龟壳里面，保护自己。
那现在的我呢？
现在的我，才发现。。
越是害怕，越是容易受伤。

有时候，
会反问自己，这是我吗？？
原来的自己去了哪里？？
曾几何时，
变得那么虚伪？？
让笑容成了最好的掩饰工具？？
当初的冲动和任性的决定是否对的？？
我是否不应该出现在这里？？
我的出现仿佛只会带来困扰而已。。
当初，
如果知道这决定会带来这一切，
我是否还是做一样的决定呢？？
或许，
这就是因为我的任性决定而付的代价。
请给我坚强下去的力量。。

很多事情，
我不想去解释。
懂我的人，不需要解释你也会明白。
不懂我的人，我的解释，你会相信多少??
如果每一次，我都需要长篇大论的解释与交待，
我只能告诉你，
我累了。
信不信，随便你。

时间一天一天的减少，
也代表着我待在这里的时间越来越短了。
这一切或许会随着时间慢慢的冲淡。。
但是，
这一切让我开始明白，
原来有些事，有些人，
不是你努力争取就能拥有的。

- z.u.z.z -

放手让你走

‘ 我舍不得 可是时间回不去
   爱你很值得 可是该停了
   没有我 你要好好的 ’

最近爱上了玄子的‘舍不得’ 。。
家里的人不停的播放着这首歌。。
如果看到自己喜欢的人，
因为自己而煎熬不已的时候。。
再不舍，
也会放手让他走。。
只想要你幸福。。
本来希望自己会是你的幸福，
后来才发现原来自己带给你的，
却是煎熬。。

有一种爱叫放手。。
放手让你走。。
把疼痛，难过，不舍留给了自己。。
泪流尽了，心受伤了。。
回忆在脑海里不停的播放着。。
你的承诺。。
你的温度。。
也随着你的离开而废去了。。

‘爱’ 这个字。。
让人感到幸福也会让人受苦。。
我曾经天真的以为，
只要两个人互相喜欢就可以在一起了。。
在爱情里面，
只有爱和不爱那么简单而已。。
是我太天真了还是爱本来就那么复杂？？
我以为只要对的人出现了。。
爱情就会开花。。
我要的幸福就到了。。
慢慢的发现，
原来爱不是只有甜而已。。
爱也包含了撕心裂肺的痛，含着泪的不舍，让人不懂该进或退的等待。。
还有双方有没有勇气一起去冒这个险，创造属于他们的未来。。

有时候，
一方终于拿出勇气来了。。
决定冒险一次。。
可是另一方却胆怯了。。
如果前方有1000步，
或许你愿意踏出999步。。
但是不是每个人愿意踏出那最后一步。。

不是每一句‘对不起’，
就能换回一句‘没关系’。。
同样的，
不是每一句‘我爱你’，
都能得到‘我也爱你’当回复。。

让自己勇敢，坦白一次。。
只是不想让自己留下遗憾。。
让自己拥有后悔的机会。。
这是对的还是错的呢？？

不一样的一年 ^^

不知不觉一年过了..就这样来沙劳越一年了..
这一年过的平凡却独特..
这一年所经历的事情..
无法用言语去表达..
有时侯我会反问自己为什么当初那么的任性??
当初的任性,当初的刁蛮,当初的孩子气..是否对的??
结局是否会一样?? 现在的生活又会是怎样??

在这里认识一群很好的Sibu朋友..
也让别人误以为我也是来自Sibu :)
可是..
人终会想家.. [Homesick]
比起以前,我向妈妈说的事越来越多了..
有多少次在电话里,哭着向妈妈诉苦..
距离上次在妈妈面前哭的时候应该是三,四年前的事情了..
或许因为想念,让人的关系拉近了..也学会了珍惜这份亲情..

今年21岁的生日过的很有意义..
吃了好几个蛋糕..
感谢神..
祂放了许许多多不同的人在我的生命里面...
翻转了我的生命...
让我的生命变得不一样...
感谢袮 *LOVE*

~ Stay LOVE ~

[ONE LOVE - z.u.z.z]

** 如果一句'我等你'可以换你的一句'我爱你',

我愿意对你说这一句承诺...

可是事实却是..

我无法让你有勇气重去相信爱情.

所以我愿意认输了. **

S'wak - Damai Beach :)

S'wak Damai Beach :)
Beautiful? hehe XD
Stay in S'wak - Unimas almost 1 semester lar..
Falling in love for S'wak skyline.. night sky..
It different with Ipoh.. :)

Thx God for answer my prayer and HIS arrangement :)
Here, really a beautiful country..
Although I still need some time in S'wak food..
In fact, I still miss Ipoh food, frens, buddies, and my sweet sweet Family :)

* miss miss miss*
*pray pray pray*

Keep praying for HIS purpose and plans in my life :)
** I surrender all.. Surrender all for YOU **

I miss Ipoh :)

Unconsciously I've came S'wak one month ad.
One month ago, I still at Ipoh.
Hmn.. wat am i doing tat time leh?
outing? Chit-chating? Eating some delicious meal?
I miss Ipoh honestly :)

感慨

最近新闻报道越来越多小孩被遇害.

说真的,听到了心莫名其妙有点酸.

一个天真无邪的脸蛋与笑容.

真的无法想象,竟然下得了手??

 她们还没有见识到外面的世界甚至还没开口说话,

就要向世界告别了.

最心疼的应该就是那个才2岁的小女孩吧.

剥夺她生存权利的竟是她母亲.

难道长得苦瓜脸就注定不好的了吗?

所以她就要被瘧待了吗? 

她的案件让我想起了他.

不过,还是感谢神.

若不是他的迷信,

妈妈的不信与独立的性格,

上帝的保守与看顾,

或许现在的我应该难以想象.

永远不知道下一秒会发生什么事情.

我只知道阿爸天父永远掌管和看顾与保守着我们每一个人,

无论多少个的'下一秒'.

你相信吗?

Thanks God for all HIS blessing :)

Time is never wait for someone.

Just a blink of eyes, form 6's life is end.

Exam is just left 2 paper.

What is going happen for next moment, no ones knows.

Honestly, I really worry about the result. :(

But, thanks LORD for giving me a special parents.

I really love you although sometimes we argue with one another.

Thanks God. :)

Every time when I'm sad or disappointed,

Thanks God, u r the one who come to encourages me with God's word and

ur experiences. 

Just like what they told me just now.

Life is short. No point to waste time for carry all the worries.

Life is short. We should enjoy every chapters in our life.

Think the positive ways no matter what situations we are.

Exam may just a proses in our life. Just enjoy.

God always have HIS plan and ways for us.

Amen :)

ONE HOPE

ONE LOVE 

ONE FAITH 

ONE GOD

GO 4 GOD :)

[z.u.z.z. @ grace]

矛盾的自己

试考结束了, 大概也知道自己的程度到那里.

如果告诉你没有压力是骗人的.

它离我的梦很远.

它离我的希望很远.

我害怕. 我想逃.

我不想面对它,

我不敢面对它.

最近我的脾气暴燥到不行.

连我自己也不认识自己,甚至厌恶到极点.

就是控制不了自己.

一点小事,脾气就来了.

脾气来,眼泪就来了.

一些莫名其妙的感觉也跟着来.

心跟思想在打架.

现在的我,不是我要的自己.

这不是我要的我.

这不是我要的性格.

可是我不能控制她.

有谁能告诉我到底怎么了?

我可以怎样?

好想把所有的东西都扔掉.

把自己藏到世界某一个安静的角落一段时间.

远离这个乱七八糟的生活.

我的生活一团糟.

我的生命一团糟.

什么东西都乱七八糟.

可是我还有好多东西还没做.

功课写不完!!!

书背不起来!!!

要点记不得!!!

我怎样考试!!!

妈妈以为我不喜欢她对我说的话而闹脾气.

天知道,对她的话我没意见. 

只是不懂 为什么我回答的语气很不好,

生气的不是你,应该是我自己.

我到底是谁?

其实房间是我最舒服的空间.

我喜欢呆在房间安静一个人.

我喜欢半夜因为是最安静的时间.

很多时候,我总觉得家很吵.

尤其是下午.

电视机声,责备声,唠叨声,对戏的意见,大呼小叫声等等.

我想出去,去比较一些比较安静的地方,

可是不懂去哪里,又想呆在房间.

矛盾.

Trial STPM

好久都没有更新部落格啦 :)

转眼间, trial STPM 到了.

 今天考了第一张, 就知道没有了8分. 唉 :(

我能达到我要的目标吗?

 九个月过后, 会有可能实现我的愿望吗?

 我可以吗? 我也在怀疑.

以爹地所说, 感恩与感谢神无论结果如何.

 他已有美好计划在我们每个人的生命中.

 感恩吧 :)

前天,薇走了,去了新加坡. 

Take care, dear :)

 大学要开学了, 很多人都去报到了.

  他应该也报到了.

 虽然和他不大熟, 不过希望他一切顺利.

 总在无意间想起你. 

你在那,一切还好吗? 还适应吗?

期待下次与你相遇虽然机会有些渺茫.

如果有机会相遇,希望你还记得我.

 希望我们能成为朋友

愿神祝福你 :)

 加油咯!

原来一切都只不过是空气

'Is this all I've been waiting for?

Is this all I've been searching for?
我在追寻什么东西?
原来一切都只不过是空气.
So, is this all I've been waiting for?'

我究竟在追寻什么?
转眼间,
二十年快过去 .
回头望去,
我做了什么呢?
每天都重复上演一样的戏码.
我的梦是什么?

人的思想真的很奇怪.
永远抓不透.
当你拥有,不懂得珍惜.
当你失去,懂得后悔的滋味.
人的要求永远都不满足.
永远都想超越现在.
想创造一个奇迹,一个不可能.

过去?
已变成历史,回不去.
'早知道' 只是一场幻想.
现在?
要把握, 不然下一秒就是一个回忆.
未来?
多么遥远和神秘的旅程.
带着期待去等待,希望能遇到自己想到达的目的地.

如果你我的生命剩下最后的24小时,
你我会如何去度过?
珍惜每分每秒.

Vanness Wu - Is This All

作曲：Ryan Tedder

填詞：崔惟楷

編曲：林於賢/Starr. C

監製：K.Y.B

一天一天　重覆上演　奔跑著卻沒有終點

付出一切　拼湊一片　我期待生活有所改變

可笑的他們　冷漠的臉　事不關己的語言

我拼了命　奮力向前　把明天都實現

我祈禱我能遇見　所謂完美的世界

Is this all I've been waiting for?

Is this all I've been searching for?

我在追尋甚麼東西　原來不過都只是空氣

So is this all I've been waiting for?

Waiting for , waiting for...

半開的眼　半醒的眠　思緒被困在夢裡面

我想看見　卻看不見　是否已經到了極限

我祈禱我能遇見　所謂完美的世界

Is this all I've been waiting for?

Is this all I've been searching for?

我在追尋甚麼東西　原來不過都只是空氣

So is this all I've been waiting for?

Waiting for , waiting for...

Is this all I've been waiting for?

Is this all I've been searching for?

我在追尋甚麼東西　原來不過都只是空氣

So is this all I've been waiting for?

Waiting for , waiting for...

Is this all I've been waiting for?

Is this all I've been searching for?

我在追尋甚麼東西　原來不過都只是空氣

So is this all I've been waiting for?

Waiting for , waiting for...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_t4FGuCvGmY&feature=related

Happy Valentine's day ^^

今天是情人节. :)
虽然单身, 但是我还在期待地等着神为我安排的那个人.
虽然我不懂他会是谁,可是我期待着他会是怎样的.. :)
哈哈 :)

最近开始重新练习回吉他.
以前总是害怕手指会脱皮或者什么的,
可是现在却感到兴奋当看见手指开始要脱皮了 :)
它好象在告诉我,这是起点而已,还要更努力. :)
在琴方面,我更加要加油了.
要开始退步了 :(

刚刚看见一些朋友的照片,
我发觉,
在打扮上还有某些方面上,
她们都在进步.
可是只有我还在原地踏步甚至还退步了. :(

自由自在,
不可懒惰了!!!
起来了!!!!
看着目标,看着梦想,
拼了!!
要记得,
神是你随时的帮助,是你的盾牌,
是你的避难所,你的依靠与力量,
是你的一切所有.
你不会是一个人而已,
还有神在你身边,无时无刻与你同在. :)



[ Fight for ur dream. With God ALL things is POSSIBLE!!! - z.u.z.z ]

CNY is coming ^.^

CNY's holiday is started..
Hehe..
But this year didn't went KL for reunion dinner..

A blink of eyes,
grandpa is passed away around 3 years ad.
Honestly, I miss him.
But, I think he should be very peaceful and enjoy now.
I think he is in the presence of God now.
Praise and worshiping our God.
I know,
one day,we'll meet again.

Anyway, treasure and appreciate what we have.
A humble and thankful heart is very precious.

One HOPE, One LOVE,
One GOD, One FAITH.

[Praise God no matter what situation that you having - z.u.z.z ]

Count the BLESSING of GOD ^^

Recently my sleeping time have tuned to 2 a.m ad :(
Homework is totally can overwhelmed me..
The real Form 6's life is started.
But,
I'm enjoy every moment with my classmates, buddies and frens. :)
6AK2 !!! Love it.
Thank you, Lord.
All are your blessing.
Thank you, Lord,
for everything that you've blessed me.
From the bottom of my heart,
Thank you, LORD !!!
I love you, LORD. :)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
最近我开始学习放手和交托给神.
很多东西我不舍得放.
口里说交托给神,
心却为自己做起最坏的打算或者想办法,用我自己的方法去解决.
我承认害怕失去.
害怕自己承受不了失去后的痛.
无形中, 我把很多东西都抓的很紧很紧.
说穿了, 我更害怕受伤尤其在感情方面.
可是,
当感情出现了问题,我逃得比谁都快.
我害怕受伤的那个痛.
我害怕我自己会连站起来的勇气都没有.
更不用说复原的能力了.
可是我发觉当我捉的越紧,
就越害怕失去.
很多负面的思想就会在我脑海里徘徊.
因为害怕,我忘了去看看四周,去感受身边的景物.
我还在学习中.
自由自在, 加油了.

ONE GOD, ONE LOVE,
ONE HOPE, ONE FAITH




[ With God ALL things is possible - z.u.z.z ]

Happy New Year

Happy New Year 2011 :)
A brand new start is begin.
A challenge year is start.
A great change should be start.
Never be the same AGAIN.

Lord Jesus,
I need a breakthrough this year.
Show me your way, Lord.

MOGLOM =)

Merry Christmas ^0^

Merry Christmas :)
Lord Jesus, thank you for your love.
Thank you for come to the earth.
I'm grateful to be your child.
Maybe I'm not the best but
Lord Jesus, I pray that a new year,
a new life , a new me. :)
A changing life. ^^
Watashi wa,-nushi iesu o aishi teru

Not what you want me to do for you
But is
What can I do for you. :)

This year is a special Christmas.
Although this year don't have much present.
But the greatest present for me this year is the time which spend with my family.
Mummy's cooked.
Although not the shark fin that kind of food,
but mummy's cooked always is the most delicious food :)
A blessed time with family.
How sweet the family that God have giving to me.
Thanks, God.
God, You're Awesome, A great God.

One LOVE
One HOPE
One FAITH
ONE GOD


[ A new me, keep in pray - Z.U.Z.Z ]

Appreciate What We Have

Recently quite hot in suicide topic.
For me,
I definitely disagree solving a problem by using this solution.
I felt that,
Using this way is not taking responsibility on their life
and quite selfish.
It not a mature thinking.
Just try to skip away from it.
They have bring the sadness to their family.
Even for some innocent people.
Parents used to take care of you with all their love,
maybe they have put some expectation on you.
You never know how sad they are.
How pain in their heart.

In hospital,
In this world,
How many ppls wish to live longer..
But they din have the chance to continue their life.
Life is the present from GOD.
Why we don't appreciate it ?
It is a very precious gift.
Maybe somebody will blame that,
why my life so tough?
BUT if you compare with the others,
we are blessed.
Thanks GOD for every breath we have.
GOD BLESS.

[A thankful heart is more than enough - Z.U.Z.Z]

Faith :)

Go or not go ?
I wished to go but it had crushed with my tuition.
So. now the thing that I can do is PRAY.
Just can PRAY.
Just leave it to GOD.

Walk by faith, not by sight.
Don't let the world steal your feelings,
HOPE, LOVE and FAITH.
The most greatest is LOVE :)

It's your decision.
How do you live,
happy or not.
blissful or not.
So,
God bless you :)


[ In my life, YOU always will be the only,
No one can replace YOU - Z.U.Z.Z ]

Sorry That I Loved You - Anthony Neely

词:倪安东/Skot suyimi(中译/陶晶莹)
曲:Skot Suyimi
LRC制作:IN-CORNER QQ:11505166

For all of the time that i tried for your smile
For making you think that i was worth the while

So your love love love love love would be mine
For sending you flowers and holding your hand
That no one was there to take a stand
But then love love love made us blind
And I'm so sorry that I hurt you
Sorry that I fell through
Sorry i was falling in love with you

I'm sorry that it came true
But sorry doesn't turn back time
For all that i have done to you
I wish that i could make it right
So sorry that i loved you
Sorry that i needed you
Sorry that i hold you tight

And I'm So sorry for...
Making you love me and saying goodbye
For being the one that taught you how to cry
It was love love love and it passed us by
For giving you every thing that you dreamed
For taking it back when i fled the scene
sorry love,for wasting your time

And I'm so sorry that I hurt you
Sorry that I fell through
Sorry

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ffS40XbwUZI

23.11.2010

2010 skull life is end.
Which means that LOWER 6 life is end.
2011 is coming.
Upper 6 life is begin.
A great challenges is coming soon.

My holiday is full of tuition.
Some of my fren also work hard for earn more money.
Maree Ooi also having a blessed trip with her lovely hubby.
How sweet they are. :)
I really hope one day can receive their wedding invitation card.
Fren, stay blissful ya :)

Just now I saw a advertisment in internet.
- http://www.coos.org.sg/Assets/downloads/GoodNewsRallyFlyer_web.pdf
Pastor Philip and VanNess Wu is coming to SG.
To have a salvation meeting - SALVATION MESSAGE AND PRAYERS FOR THE SICK
on 26 & 27 November 2010.
Keep praying for this meeting although I'm not attend the meeting.
May God annoiting them and so on.
Glory is for God.

[ Hope, Love. Faith ]
[ but LOVE is the biggest ]

[ Surrender all to YOU, Lord. - Z.U.Z.Z ]